About Me

My Story

Horses teach you an awful lot, very little of it is to do with horses and the right one will change you in ways you never imagined or saw coming.

That’s Jessie. She’s taught me about friendship, empathy, kindness, how to listen, and I mean really listen, and patience. To pay attention to actions and behaviours over words, and how to lead and to allow myself to be led.

When Jessie came home in 2018, I thought I’d bought a ‘solid’ horse, when in reality she’d suffered abuse & trauma and didn’t trust people – she was shut down and ready to defend herself at all costs.

For the first couple of years, I was scared of her. I was scared on the ground, I was scared in the saddle and I spent a lot of time wondering if I’d made a big mistake.

Then, in 2020, everything came to a head. I was signed off work for five months with work-related stress and anxiety. My union representative described me as “wired”, and looking back, that’s exactly how I felt. I was also struggling with Jessie… I was scared of her, of what was happening in my own life, in tears most of the time and at my lowest. 

Following advice. I took a step back and re-evaluated mine & Jessie’s relationship, and decided I needed to get out of the dark place I’d found myself in. Instead of focusing on training, I focused on our relationship. During lockdown, I spent hours sitting in the field while Jessie grazed. We slowed everything down. We learned to trust each other before asking anything more.

As I changed, so did she.

The calmer I became, the calmer she became. The more I learned to support myself, the better I was able to support her. Our partnership changed, but so did every other part of my life. I found my voice, let go of years of people pleasing and started living as a much more authentic version of myself.

Looking back, what started out as horse training was anything but. It changed me in ways I never expected and ultimately led me into coaching.

Today, Jessie and I are still learning together. We still have moments that challenge us, because that’s part of horses and life. The difference is that I no longer feel like I have to have all the answers and I have the space to work things through. I know what helps me when life feels overwhelming, and I have a partnership with my horse that’s built on trust rather than pressure.

These days, Jessie has an opinion, and I love that she has an opinion. The difference is, she doesn’t have to shout anymore. I wouldn’t change any part of the journey we’ve been on because it’s made me the person I am today.

The biggest lesson Jessie has taught me is this:

You don’t just work with the horse you have on any given day. You also work with the version of yourself that turns up that day.

For me, that’s where lasting change begins.